Friday, February 17, 2017

Hey, Let's Talk About Gender Identity!

Oh boy, here we go, another one of Brian's pandering SJW articles that aren't about movies or comics, so let's just roll our eyes and go take potshots at easy targets online in comment sections. If you're looking for a topical target, I hear PewDiePie got in trouble for doing so terribly anti-Semitic stuff recently...as opposed to the anti-Semitic shit he did in the past. Or the racist shit. It's okay though, because he's funny and donates to charity!

Nobody tell Mel that's an option. I don't think we need him taking up stand-up.

After a long slog through the beginning of this year, which is still feeling very sloggy, I find myself reminiscing to better times. Like my childhood...when I got picked on for being effeminate and mostly hanging out with girls. Wait, was there a better time? Nevermind, let's focus. Yes, despite me being a giant bear of a man who could easily star in a remake of The Life and Time of Grizzly Adams, I was once a tiny little kid who very easily passed for a girl.

If I told you this was my sister, you'd probably believe me.
But, what most people around me as a child really didn't know (and still probably don't) is that I wasn't sure I was a boy or a girl. I had a lot of mixed messages being sent to me, from people at school telling me how pretty I was in a nice way to people calling me gross for looking too much like a girl. It probably didn't help that when my sister and cousin dressed me up in a dress and makeup...I liked it. It felt nice. I still love how dresses look to this day, but I don't think I'd wear any today. I just don't think most people would react very well to my hairy ass in a skirt.

Then again, I did look great in that flannel shirt dress.
The point is that gender identity isn't something cut and dry. You can't just tic a little box one or the other and call it a day. People don't all feel the same. Our experiences, our sensations, these things are unique to us and you can't force someone to be something they're not. I consider myself a man, but I very easily could've gone another way had certain experiences not happened as they did. I could be waxing regularly and walking around looking like I'm fabulous as fuck. And no, that wouldn't mean that I am gay. If I were gay, I'd be gay. But see, I'm not straight either. I'm not sure what you'd call me. Demisexual, sure, but there are people who insist that's not enough. For me it is.

I am what I am and what I am is this.
Now, I don't profess to be any sort of expert. My experiences with my own gender identity are honestly a drop in the bucket compared to the struggles that many have to cope with.  So many lives are lost because of people not feeling sake to be who they are because society insists biologically that there are only two genders, as if biology is the only factor. Being true to who you are is important but respecting someone's identity is just as important. I have people I know, people that I care about desperately, who are non-binary. It is who they are and that is valid. Seeing anyone attack the concept of their identity or calling it "not real" doesn't just insult them but it insults me. I was raised to respect people for who they are and to treat them like they deserve. This means I stand up for good people I love and will call out bullshit when it's lobbed. I try to be a wall for my loved ones.

It helps that I am already kind of a wall of flesh.
When it comes to things like this, I believe you cannot speak properly about the idea of gender unless you've had to question yours. Otherwise you're just coming off like a dick looking to impose your viewpoint onto someone because you don't agree with how they feel. You don't get to pick how people feel. And if you have dick and feel like woman? Guess what? You're probably a woman. But maybe you're not. Maybe you're just something else, which is also fine. If you're reading my mad ramblings and feel like you're not sure, I just want you to know that's it's okay not to be sure. Take your time. Be true to who you are and it will come to you and you will hopefully be able to safely move forward. And if you're someone who disagrees and thinks there's only two genders and that gender is solely a biological thing? I'm sorry, but you're wrong. Because biology doesn't decide who we are, how we feel, or how we live. Later days, bleeders.

Tesla wants me to remind you all that gender constructs are things we created. Then he ate an entire cake.

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